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Past Indiscretion<--Biting me in the ****? Posted on 01-06-2009
Tenacity

When I was a freshman, I came into school like most freshmen without a clue about Greek life and even more so black Greek life. So when I started hearing all the stereotypes about all the BGL sororities at my school minus Sigma Gamma Rho who arenít on campus I began to make my decision on the sorority I was interested in based on these stereotypes. During NPHC week of spring semester of my freshman year, I blurted out ďso when are you gonna start a new lineĒ to one of the members of the organization. Stupid, yes? I basically stated this out of curiosity and not really out of interest at the time. Needless to say, she was offended and when I went back to apologize because this had been the sorority that I was kind of interested in (but not for sure). I told her through a less than formal internet message that I was sorry and that I was ďreally interestedĒ in her organization. Stupid of me, because at the time, I hadnít done my research. After this it was a huge spiral of me convincing myself that I was interested in this sorority. When I did my research I neglected doing research on any other sorority subconsciously forcing myself to love this one. Truth is, the only thing keeping me attach to the sorority were the colors and their brother fraternity that of which isnít a good enough reason to be in any organization. The sororityís chapter at my school had one active member who was supposed to graduate by the end of my sophomore year. It was rare to see me at one of the sororityís events because it was rare for them to hold one. The only indicator of my interest was three women in the sorority who I actually told that I was intrested and other people who happened to be in my business at the time. OK! Now finally here is my dilemma, my attempting to convince myself that I was interested in the sorority began to decline once I began to find myself as an individual more. I discover the severity of joining a sorority. Itís not something that is all fun and games but actually a lifelong commitment. From that I realize that I was actually interested in another sorority finally by my junior year of college. I decided this time as a more mature individual to do my research on every BGL sorority, even Sigma Gamma Rho, which I stated before were not on my campus. I know now where Iím meant to be but I am afraid that my past discrepancies will hinder me going further in my FINAL decision of interest. I know how serious all the members of BGLOs take themselves and Iím afraid that I may be frowned upon because of my indecisiveness, if you will. Can anyone give me your opinion?
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C Nels replied on 01-06-2009 04:11PM [Reply]
Whose life decision is it? Who are you doing this for? Who's going to go through the process? The answer should be the same for each, "you". Yeah you may be frowned upon for changing your mind but you wouldn't be the first or last to do so. You've done the proper research and have made a truly informed decision and not just a lackadaisical one. I'm sure I posted this before in another thread but I can't find it, but in the end it all falls back on you. Folk can't frown upon you if you are actually doing the work of the organization and not just being a letter wearer. They might talk about you for changing your mind, but you'll make it through. The joke will get old after a while....been there done that. So go for what you know and I pray that you achieve your goal!
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replied on 01-06-2009 04:19PM [Reply]
Thanks for that, I was curious because first I don't have anyone else to talk to about this matter so I figured I would get the most honest opinion from someone who I don't know and doesn't know me. Your opinion was great! Thanks again!
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C Nels replied on 01-06-2009 04:40PM [Reply]
You're welcome.
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