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Wedding Bells for any of you guys? Posted on 04-13-2008
smc112

I guess I might need to direct this question to the guys ages 23 and up. Are any of you guys thinking about marriage in the near future and if so, what's making you want to commit? I've found that a lot of guys are waiting to their late 20's and early 30's to get married. Why is that? Is that the golden age for guys now to settle down? On the flip side, what's taking you so long to get married? Alright, fellas... let it rip!
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C Nels replied on 04-13-2008 07:32PM [Reply]
I got married 2 yrs ago (coming up on the 29th). We were together for 7 yrs before I proposed. The two main issues for me were: 1) having a foundation to be able to support a family and 2) moving back down south from Philly. I didn't want to start a family there so we waited. Then after a while I just put it all in God's Hands and He led me to where I am now...solid foundation and living in the South! Committment wasn't a factor. And it's funny that you brought this topic up, my twin just proposed to his now fiance this past Friday! So don't give up on waiting on your "knight in shining armor" just yet, ladies! ~riding off into the sunset on my trusty steed ~
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TSUblueTiger replied on 04-14-2008 12:24PM [Reply]
I think people are focusing on their careers, after college. Once they are financially stable, they start to consider marriage and settling down. In general, it takes longer to become financially stable today as opposed to our parents generation. The trend in society is different in terms of requirements and careers. In the past, it only took a high school diploma to qualify for most jobs. Currently, it takes at least a bachelors degree for most jobs. Therefore, people are starting their careers at 22 as opposed to 18, which shifts everything to the right. Personally, I would commit, if I thought we were compatible (emotionally, spiritually, etc). I have never set an age to get married. I have always been open at any age, after 18.
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TSUblueTiger replied on 04-14-2008 12:30PM [Reply]
C_Nels wrote:
So don't give up on waiting on your "knight in shining armor" just yet, ladies!
I agree with that statement. Give the brothers an opportunity to find you! We are definitely looking for you!
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NeoSoulBrotha replied on 04-14-2008 12:31PM [Reply]
I'm soon to be 27, and marriage is probably not too far in the future... The reason guys usually wait to get married, is usually so we can finish our education, have a stable place to live and good employment, and be able to provide for a family. Or, sometimes it's just waiting for the right person. Just because a couple is dating doesn't mean that person is the one they want to spend a lifetime with. Some dudes just enjoy the single life, or being free to play the field. It's all personal preference. Getting married while living in mama's basement / working a dead end job... not cool.
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smc112 replied on 04-14-2008 01:12PM [Reply]
Okay, the general consensus is that most guys are waiting to be financially stable. Now, what about guys who are financially stable and way up in their 30’s and still haven’t settled down to get married? On the flip side, what about these guys that have 2 or 3 kids by a woman, and they are living together and he won’t marry her. I see a lot of women that are having children by these men and still don’t have a engagement ring. What’s up with that?
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TSUblueTiger replied on 04-14-2008 05:17PM [Reply]
smc112 wrote:
Okay, the general consensus is that most guys are waiting to be financially stable. Now, what about guys who are financially stable and way up in their 30’s and still haven’t settled down to get married? On the flip side, what about these guys that have 2 or 3 kids by a woman, and they are living together and he won’t marry her. I see a lot of women that are having children by these men and still don’t have a engagement ring. What’s up with that?
For guys in their late 30’s, I am not sure about the exact reason. Maybe they are happy with their current lifestyle and don’t want to change. For people that live together, I think they are content with their situation. They are receiving the benefits of a marriage without being married. I am not saying I agree, but that could be the case.
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smc112 replied on 04-14-2008 06:39PM [Reply]
TSUblueTiger wrote:
For guys in their late 30ís, I am not sure about the exact reason. Maybe they are happy with their current lifestyle and donít want to change. For people that live together, I think they are content with their situation. They are receiving the benefits of a marriage without being married. I am not saying I agree, but that could be the case.
Yeah, just wondering. I see a lot of that going on now days.
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TSUblueTiger replied on 04-16-2008 09:36AM [Reply]
How long should you date someone before you get married? How do you know, when its time? Is it how you feel or something you do, after a few years?
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smc112 replied on 04-16-2008 11:54AM [Reply]
TSUblueTiger wrote:
How long should you date someone before you get married? How do you know, when its time? Is it how you feel or something you do, after a few years?
I don't know if you were waiting for a reply from the guys or not, but I feel that people should date at least 2 years before they marry. After two years, everything should be revealed about a person. People can't hide their true nature for two years, because it will start to come out. The importance of waiting is for you to see the good, the bad, and the ugly in the person. If you see signs of things that you can't deal with in a marriage, you might need to leave. When I say things you can't deal with, I'm not meaning that he/she leaves dirty socks on the floor. What I'm talking about is character issues. If the person has character issues you couldn't deal with in a marriage, you need to leave. I can't deal with a man who lacks integrity. In the past, I've dated guys who lacked integrity, and I realized that is not what I want in a marriage.
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