What to Do?
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Posted By: Bernadette Holcomb on February 23, 2005 Have u ever been wit someone and felt that you were changin urself to level wit them, to maybe, make them happy. U feel like it's the right thing, it's what u want at first but then u realize bein urself is what u really want and u try to break it off wit dat person but each time it gets harder and harder becuase u think u really care them and they show that really care for u. If you enjoyed this article, Join HBCU CONNECT today for similar content and opportunities via email! |
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Bernadette Holcomb
From Montclair, NJ North Carolina A&T State University class of 2008 Member Since July 2004 |
Comments
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No...it's not right. You need to be yourself. They can't love you for who you are if you are not yourself. Sometimes, you have to lose a friend to gain two. Just be yourself...and let them know that you never mean any harm or anything...
Wednesday, February 23rd 2005 at 4:16AM |
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Girl I know exactly what you mean. Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 8 months now and he is a very stubborn person. I have changed for him in a number of ways but in my opinion i dont think its necessarilly wrong to change for someone you really care about if u know it will only better the relationship...for example...i am a selfish person...well i found that out the hard way...and my boyfriend brought it to my attention during one of our arguments...i was complaining that he wasnt seeing me enough and callin me enough...what i chose to ignore was the fact that on my end of the spectrum neither was I...i was so worried about him callin me and makin me feel as if he cared when the whole time i was complainin i never really considered his feelings...my change in the realtionship was becoming less selfish and taking his feeling into cosideration...i am a spoiled brat and in this relationship he makes it certain that i dont get everything i want and i dont have everything my way...so i guess all in all it depends on what changes u are making...the way i see it...as long as it isnt physical changes...or extraordinary changes...make sure the changes better the relationship and doesnt necessarilly change the REAL YOU...
Wednesday, February 23rd 2005 at 2:16PM |
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I think this happens alot with females. Sometimes we give them (males) the upper hand when they see we are willing to lower our standards for them. I went through the same situation last semester. I realized that, if I don't take a stand, he would run all over me. Even though I cared about him a whole lot. I think I cared about him more than I did myself. When I decided to stand up for myself I had to of course he was like "You trippin now" but really this was who I really was. He was unable to see that because they relationship was basically centered around him. I couldn't hurt myself and friends anymore.
Wednesday, March 9th 2005 at 2:39PM |
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Spirits get knit but only "God" can via your choice. Just ask, Jer 33:3, you already know the answer though and already know what You will do. Hope all works out. Blessings Thursday, January 12th 2006 at 12:08PM |
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