I saw this post by SkegeeLady about a good man so I figured I'd ask ya'll...
IS A GOOD WOMAN HARD TO FIND...
and what makes a good woman.
I've had this debate before and its always interesting to see what others are looking for. Personally, these days women are just like men and i'm quickly realizing that they aren't as innocent as they claim to be (sit in a room with 3-5 girls and listen to them talk and u'll see where I'm coming from). I've seen, heard, and experienced things that were done from these self proclaimed good. Given... nobodies perfect and we all fall short but dang somw of ya'll go issues and i'm beginning to realize that you disguise them more than guys. I can honestly say that I know only 2 that are for sure and one is going off to Australia and the other one's about to be taken (if i have anything to do with it :twisted: ) so there isn't too much hope for ya'll other cats out there lol.
Fella's let me know how u feel... (not tryin to be rude ladies but i'm really trying to hear from them on this one). I already know what the ladies will prolly say in response to this. I'm really more curious to what the fella's feel...
I saw this post by SkegeeLady about a good man so I figured I'd ask ya'll...
IS A GOOD WOMAN HARD TO FIND...
and what makes a good woman.
I've had this debate before and its always interesting to see what others are looking for. Personally, these days women are just like men and i'm quickly realizing that they aren't as innocent as they claim to be (sit in a room with 3-5 girls and listen to them talk and u'll see where I'm coming from). I've seen, heard, and experienced things that were done from these self proclaimed good. Given... nobodies perfect and we all fall short but dang somw of ya'll go issues and i'm beginning to realize that you disguise them more than guys. I can honestly say that I know only 2 that are for sure and one is going off to Australia and the other one's about to be taken (if i have anything to do with it :twisted: ) so there isn't too much hope for ya'll other cats out there lol.
Fella's let me know how u feel... (not tryin to be rude ladies but i'm really trying to hear from them on this one). I already know what the ladies will prolly say in response to this. I'm really more curious to what the fella's feel...
I understand you said you want the guys to answer you on this one, but I have one wittle question: When you say you only know two who are FOR SURE... I don't know exactly what you mean. For sure virgins? For sure "good girls"? For sure sane? Please elaborate... cause it sounds sort of crazy. Sorry for clogging up the thread with my estrogen, lol....
A good woman. . . I feel you on the good women are scarce frame of mind. I know a lot of females and to find one that's a close to 100% real is very difficult. Before I get into what I think a good woman is I'm going to point out characteristics I've noticed in a lot of women lately which I don't consider good traits. First of all women can be very deceptive. They can say a lot based on emotions which turn out to be false in the future. They can also be selfish and have double standards. . . I'm sure everyone can think of examples of this. You know what, I'm sitting here talkin bout grimey a$$ females and choosing my words so the grimey a$$ females on here won't get mad. So neways, it goes beyond how yall treat the fellas. . . Y is it that two females can't be friends for longer than a year or two??? Cuz yall be doing grimey a$$ $hit. Y is it that yall wait untill a man and a woman get in a beautiful happy relationship b4 you even take a second look at that man??? Cuz yall be doing grimey a$$ $hit.
Aight aight. . . this post is about good females so I'ma stop lookin at the negative. A good female in my book has to have these traits. Honesty. . . It's not that all females always lie, it's just that when they do, they tell lies that cause the most pain. She got to be spiritual, with my experiance all the good females (all two or three of them) that I ever met were spiritual people. . . Not saying you have to be in order to be considered a good woman, I'm just going off my own experiance. . . She has to have confidence. . . I get sick of woman claiming they trust they man but "it's those triflin a$$ hoez I don't trust." If you truly trusted your man you wouldn't need to trust them. . . And in order to be trusting you got to be secure in who you are. . . Let's her man be himself. . . We should not feel like we got to water stuff down when we get around our women. . . And to be honest, most guys prolly do. . . It's like "I can't say that I'm around my girl." No yall just need to accept us for who we are and stop tryin to change us. . . and that's anotha thing. . .I can't stand controlling a$$ B. . . . . . . . . . .eautiful black females. . . My ideal woman doesn't try to control her man because the reason she's even with him is bc he is him. . . I think that's it fa now. . . . hmm. . . oh yea, stop being so fu(kin jealous. . .
Okay... thanks for clearing it up. I'm glad that you used the word relative... because EVERYTHING is relative. And everyone has baggage... males and females... it just depends on whether they want to tell you about it or not... but I could be wrong.
I'm glad you found some girls who you think are perfect, but I hope you realize that good women are everywhere... it's just that the baggage you speak of creates a barrier, so to speak, that you cannot get through. That is why it seems like you are talking to a representative when you are speaking with some girls. They are not going to open themselves up to you immediately... it takes time. Most girls have been hurt before by men (which is whole different topic), so you just have to understand that. If a girl is that truthful with you, it could mean a positive or a negative thing: Positive being you are special, and she trusts you... or Negative being while you THINK she is being different and open, you are only speaking to another "shell" that is covering her true self... a representative that is not as easy to detect... but a representative all the same. Be cautious with all girls, not just those you think you can trust because you are compatible with them. Those are the ones who hurt you the most..
Okay, okay.... I'm done.
:arrow:
I tried to post on here earlier but I guess I'm sposed to clean it up or sumtin. . . I'm still new at this stuff. . . But neway, in order to describe what a good woman is I will first say what a good woman isn't. A good woman isn't deceptive. A lot of women say things based on emotions that turn out to be false in the future (or just flat out lie). I don't think women lie more than men or something like that, but the stuff yall lie about cause the most pain. A good woman isn't controlling. . . Y some of yall act like you know whats best for us and try to play mom. . . No, we don't be tryin to date our mom. And good women don't do. . .for lack of a better choice of words. . .grimey a$$ $hit. Why is it that it's not until a man gets in a nice wonderful relationship that you notice him. Just last month I was he was the same person but now that you know he got a girl, you want to be all up on him. . . And it's not just your attitude towards men. . . Y can two females stay friends for more than a year? cuz yall be doin grimey a$$ $hit. . . but this isn't a post to focus on the trif females so I will get on the good ones I known in my life (all two or three of them).
A good female is honest. . . I got mad respect for a woman who tells the truth, even when the consequences are undesirable. A good female is confident. . . I can't stand it when a woman is insecure. . . sayin stuff like "I trust you, it's those triflin a$$ hoez I don't trust." No, if you really trust yo man you don't got to trust them. The "good females" I've come accross have all been spiritual. . . I'm not saying in order to be considered a good female you have to be, that's just what I experianced. And a woman got to respect herself. . . it's a lot I can put under here but I'm gone let this topic rest. Besides I can talk about females all day.
I tried to post on here earlier but I guess I'm sposed to clean it up or sumtin. . . I'm still new at this stuff. . . But neway, in order to describe what a good woman is I will first say what a good woman isn't. A good woman isn't deceptive. A lot of women say things based on emotions that turn out to be false in the future (or just flat out lie). I don't think women lie more than men or something like that, but the stuff yall lie about cause the most pain. A good woman isn't controlling. . . Y some of yall act like you know whats best for us and try to play mom. . . No, we don't be tryin to date our mom. And good women don't do. . .for lack of a better choice of words. . .grimey a$$ $hit. Why is it that it's not until a man gets in a nice wonderful relationship that you notice him. Just last month I was he was the same person but now that you know he got a girl, you want to be all up on him. . . And it's not just your attitude towards men. . . Y can two females stay friends for more than a year? cuz yall be doin grimey a$$ $hit. . . but this isn't a post to focus on the trif females so I will get on the good ones I known in my life (all two or three of them).
A good female is honest. . . I got mad respect for a woman who tells the truth, even when the consequences are undesirable. A good female is confident. . . I can't stand it when a woman is insecure. . . sayin stuff like "I trust you, it's those triflin a$$ hoez I don't trust." No, if you really trust yo man you don't got to trust them. The "good females" I've come accross have all been spiritual. . . I'm not saying in order to be considered a good female you have to be, that's just what I experianced. And a woman got to respect herself. . . it's a lot I can put under here but I'm gone let this topic rest. Besides I can talk about females all day.
I can definitely see what u r saying and I'll try to give you a woman's point of view...
I definitely respect your opinion, and in alot of instances, you're right. I agree with most of what you said. For all the guys, don't give up on finding a "good woman" because there are more than you think out there. I cannot speak for all women, but we are trying to get our lives together, just like we hope you guys are as well. Yeah, some of us do have some baggage. But you learn to love that person unconditionally (unless there is so much of it that you cannot see past it) and be there for them. Some females are petty and insecure and feel like they're being threatened by another girl's prescence, but it is only because somewhere along the way, they have been replaced by another girl in a man's life. I know it may not be fair that a woman will judge you based on past experiences, but what else does she have to go by? But don't give up, there alot of good women out there...
i'm finished! :arrow:
I have to agree wit Soundcheck on this one. A good woman to me is a slightly altered mirror image of myself. I know women ain't perfect, but what sets a good woman apart is her willingness to grow into a better person. A good woman will make her man feel secure about himself, and the fellas should make sure to do the same. The more you can be yourself around each other the betta. And I feel ya Ash. Guys need to understand that even though a woman may have emotional baggage, she still has the potential to be a great, passionate,and beautiful woman.
From a female!!!:
It is truly a bleesing to see black men understand what a good woman is. There is an old saying that behind every good man there is a good woman. So what I say to all of you who have not yet recieved their gift from heaven is to keep praying and she will come eventually. If you have found your good woman, men please, cherish her and treat her as the precious jewel that she is. As you see there are people out there who would do so much to have such a woman.
