okay, i have a question..
well, a few...
do you call everyone you're cool with your "friend"? now, be honest...
my mom once told me this story about when she was younger & got in trouble b/c her dad heard her say she was going to her "friend"'s house to play or whateva....he told her "everyone is not your friend - your acquaintance, maybe...but not your friend"...
i've come to see that that is so true...but still it feels a little awkward referring to certain people in your life who have FRIEND TENDANCIES (lol, 4 lack of better term) as simply, "acquaintances"...is there a better (or alternative) word for that rank?
& @ what point do you feel someone crosses over from "acquaintance" to "friend," & once that person has received that title, is there ever possibility of demotion (as in, being brought back down to just an "acquaintance"), and if so, were they ever really good enough to be called a 'friend' to begin with?when does a 'friend' become a best friend? & exactly how many 'best' friends do you have? do these people actually really deserve to be called your 'BEST friend/s'??? what have they done to deserve it?!?
& finally...we as Black people love using the terms "homie"...."homegirl/my girl"...."homeboy/my boy"...."road dawg"...etc...& i don't see anything wrong w/ it (i know i definitely use 'em!), but i just want to know - do these names rank higher or lower than the title of 'friend'...or are they equivalent??
::singin::"Friends...how many of us have them?? Friends, ones you can depend on...."
Hmm, I agree, everyone that you're cool with is NOT your friend, and sometimes the people you thought were you friends actually aren't, hey, it be's that way sometimes. I know there have been plenty of times that I've told someone, "yeah, we're cool but we ain't friends." I personally have this big trust issue with people and I generally don't trust folks for sh*t so in order for me to even CONSIDER calling you my friend, we'd have to been cool at least a year or so because it takes a while to actually get to KNOW someone (and sometimes that year isn't even long enough).
Also, I think a lot of times, people decide who their friends are after some drama goes down, whether it be big or small cuz then you see who was down for you. (but that junk doesn't always work)
I think friends become best friends after they have worked out all of the kinks in the friendship and get to that point where they respect eachother and can speak that real without upsetting the other person to the point where they'd never speak to you again. They know that trust is there and they realize that the other person is gonna be there for them cuz they have numerous times before (and they know how to keep their mouth shut and not spread ya bizness..lol). That level of comfort is there also and you just know that the other person is being real with you and will always be there for you, just like a sister. You love 'em, cut for 'em and are loyal to 'em just like you are your blood. I've known my best friend since the second grade and we're still tight to this day, and LAWD have we been through some stuff. If I do something to upset her or she does something to upset me we talk it out and it's water under the bridge because the respect is there.
YES, FRIENDS CAN BE DEMOTED cuz some stuff is just inexcusable. When that person is no longer loyal to you, for whatever reason, it's time to kick em to tha curb...these are often the times when you realize the person wasn't your friend to begin with.
Lastly, homeboys/homegirls, etc. aren't always on the true friend level. Sometimes ya homegirl is someone that you hang with but don't tell ya business to cuz you don't know em like THAT. Ya know, that group of girls that you can party with, they come chill in ya room, maybe go shopping together or study, but have never been to your house and don't know your momma's name?? Uh huh, that's them. Over time they may reach the friend status and MAYBE even best friend, but not as of yet.
i really dont call anybody my friend, so i guess by doing that i call everybody my friend, but to classify a lot of people would be acquaintances, a lot of people would be friends, and a few would be brothers but i dunno its pretty weird
i really dont call anybody my friend, so i guess by doing that i call everybody my friend, but to classify a lot of people would be acquaintances, a lot of people would be friends, and a few would be brothers but i dunno its pretty weird
huh :? ?
But ummm...yeah, i used to have the whole classification thing. It was real simple in highschool...there were my...
:arrow: bestfriends/sistahs/circle. About 6 chicks all drawn together by one powerful force...GOD. That's about as real as it gets. And we are STILL tight like spandex today, even tho we are all separated for college.
:arrow: homiez. These were peeps that i would converse with in class or around school, maybe on IM from time to time. I didn't really look to DEPEND on them for nothin, just folks that were cool to be around.
:arrow: Acquintances...peeps that i would say hello to here and there, but weren't really close with. I knew them...they knew me...but that was pretty much the jist of it.
HOWEVER, since i started at HU...lines have gotten blurred. I have my CLOSE circle, then there are orgs that i'm in where i have fam, then floormates, and the other cool ash peeps. Now i basically just consider MYSELF a friend to every and anyone who needs me. A friend is a friend is a friend. If someone i barely even know sees me strugglin and lends me support...they are my friend...point blank. When it comes down to it, we're all brothers and sisters anyway ...forget about all these lil systems...JUST LIVE dangit!
i really dont call anybody my friend, so i guess by doing that i call everybody my friend, but to classify a lot of people would be acquaintances, a lot of people would be friends, and a few would be brothers but i dunno its pretty weird
huh :? ?
But ummm...yeah, i used to have the whole classification thing. It was real simple in highschool...there were my...
:arrow: bestfriends/sistahs/circle. About 6 chicks all drawn together by one powerful force...GOD. That's about as real as it gets. And we are STILL tight like spandex today, even tho we are all separated for college.
:arrow: homiez. These were peeps that i would converse with in class or around school, maybe on IM from time to time. I didn't really look to DEPEND on them for nothin, just folks that were cool to be around.
:arrow: Acquintances...peeps that i would say hello to here and there, but weren't really close with. I knew them...they knew me...but that was pretty much the jist of it.
HOWEVER, since i started at HU...lines have gotten blurred. I have my CLOSE circle, then there are orgs that i'm in where i have fam, then floormates, and the other cool ash peeps. Now i basically just consider MYSELF a friend to every and anyone who needs me. A friend is a friend is a friend. If someone i barely even know sees me strugglin and lends me support...they are my friend...point blank. When it comes down to it, we're all brothers and sisters anyway ...forget about all these lil systems...JUST LIVE dangit!
lol it makes sense when i read it, cuz of the way i read it, but i guess you cant read it the same way if i didnt put any clarification in there
i really dont call anybody my friend, so i guess by doing that i call everybody my friend, but to classify a lot of people would be acquaintances, a lot of people would be friends, and a few would be brothers but i dunno its pretty weird
huh :? ?
lol it makes sense when i read it, cuz of the way i read it, but i guess you cant read it the same way if i didnt put any clarification in there
Well sir, unfortunately i didn't read it the same way u did. Had me all baffled and troubled inside :? . I tried to read it over a couple of times...but it made my head hurt...so i called it quits. But uhhhh...it just sounds like you're pretty friendly. Let's just leave it at that, k? KAY :lol:
Everyone is not a friend but aint nothing wrong with associates or someone being your cool peoples as an alternate term.
If you chill with a person for a long period of time and begin to go through many different things with them that how friendship grows and they become more than just cool peoples. And of course with friendships things happen and friendship can be damaged if not broken, that's how friend status changes.
Best friends are usually around the longest know you the best and have been through lots of things with you. They are usually people you can talk to about things. These people are a step up from close friends. True best friends don't come a dime a dozen, i got about 5 or 6.
Where I'm from homie is more a term for fellow members of your gang. Those not in gangs (such as myself) use this for people that are friends from their hood. But in my mind a homie is another word for friend.
...forget about all these lil systems...JUST LIVE dangit!
