After hearing this discussion yet again, I will attempt to finally put this to rest.
Why is it hard to find a good man or woman?
Simply... Because you cannot have a mature relationship with an immature person.
It takes time for a person's character to develop. Until it does, they may or may not be single, and may or may not be seeking a relationship. Whether they are ready for it mentally is another thing. So, in order to make a good partner they have to go through a growth process.
Once they have matured, they generally do not remain single very long. However, since the majority of people around them are immature , they become discouraged. But once they find a satisfying relationship they remain there, and are now off the market.
Think about it like an apple tree. The majority of apples on a tree at any given time will not be good for eating. They may be too small, too young, or not ripe. Plus the messed up ones left behind by everyone else. The truth is that the ripe ones are the first to be picked. So they aren't on the tree for very long. It's timing, you have to catch one after it matures and before someone else gets to it which means the odds are always against you.
Being single and mature means you are in transition , which is why it is so hard to find people like yourself. When you look around, most of the people you see aren't ready. But you are now a desired item, and your time will come soon.
My attempt to break it down. 8) Holla!
i would say that someone cant find the perfect match bc they let past relationship problems with someone else get in the way with the current person they with
After hearing this discussion yet again, I will attempt to finally put this to rest.
Why is it hard to find a good man or woman?
Simply... Because you cannot have a mature relationship with an immature person.
It takes time for a person's character to develop. Until it does, they may or may not be single, and may or may not be seeking a relationship. Whether they are ready for it mentally is another thing. So, in order to make a good partner they have to go through a growth process.
Once they have matured, they generally do not remain single very long. However, since the majority of people around them are immature , they become discouraged. But once they find a satisfying relationship they remain there, and are now off the market.
Think about it like an apple tree. The majority of apples on a tree at any given time will not be good for eating. They may be too small, too young, or not ripe. Plus the messed up ones left behind by everyone else. The truth is that the ripe ones are the first to be picked. So they aren't on the tree for very long. It's timing, you have to catch one after it matures and before someone else gets to it which means the odds are always against you.
Being single and mature means you are in transition , which is why it is so hard to find people like yourself. When you look around, most of the people you see aren't ready. But you are now a desired item, and your time will come soon.
My attempt to break it down. 8) Holla!
JadeKiss wrote:
^^^Wow I likes it alot!
To comment more on the maturity thing, me and my boyfreind were talking last night about how females and males "think alike, but react differently". Like I believe there are alot of mature males hiding in these immature mindsets that they have to parade around in to fit it. I know alot of males that once you actually get them to talking, they want the same thing we females do, a good solid relationship. But then once they get back to "their" world, they sometimes feel like they gotta pork as many girls as they can, or deny themselves to the one girl they feeling, because it doesn't "look" good. Peep pressure makes them believe that they gotta be a "****" in order to gain comarderie*sp* and respect. Am I making any sense?
Yes, girl, ya makin' sense...i feel ya 110%...
& NeoSoulBrotha...everything u spoke was truth too, as usual...
the truth is free on this issue, from both of your points of view....
NSB,
Give the people some insight into your own life. Are you the mature one who lost out, now that you're a graduate? Or do you still have some growing to do?
I was ready for something on a higher level, but those around me were not. I was confused, because I could not figure out why people claimed to want one thing while accepting the other, so I stopped looking.
Luckily, the type of person I was seeking was also looking for me. 8)
Now that I have the perspective to recognize why everything happened like it did, things make a lot more sense. Holla!
I agree with NSB 110 percent. I also think it is hard for people to fing a good man/woman because a lot of people have too many standards. And once a good man/woman comes along, they by pass them because they want someone to be exactly what meets their standards
