Okay, here's the scenario (I'd only read this if you have a nice chunk of time on your hands :roll: ):
Way back in my freshman year, I met this young lady on MiGente.com. We started talking like everyday and got really close. When we were first conversing, she had a boyfriend, so I was only talking to her, because I enjoyed the conversation. She's a very intelligent young lady, and never fails to make me think every time that I talk to her. Over the course of time, her boyfriend began treating her badly, and that's when we actually started getting close. She started opening up to me a whole lot more than she used to. I did the same as well By the time Spring Break rolled around that year, we had plans to meet each other. I had no idea what she looked like, I just knew that she was a sweet person, and I wanted to at least spend some time with her. When she showed me a picture of herself the day before I was going to meet her (she goes to school in another city about an hour away), I was totally caught off guard. She was black! She goes a school where there's all of 30 black students (its a private girls' school), and she actually talked intelligently. From the moment that I first met her in person, she'd changed the way that I looked at women. She was the exact opposite from what I thought I wanted (light skin, long, natural hair). She was brown skinned, with braids, and she even had fake coloured contacts. But somehow she was the most gorgeous thing that I'd ever laid eyes on.
So we met and went out, and after that we started getting closer. That summer, since we wouldn't be able to talk to each other on a regular basis (I was going to summer school and she was working and going to summer school in her home state), we decided that we'd write to each other. For her birthday, I sent her a little stuffed puppy and I burned some CDs that she wanted. When she got the puppy, she was thrilled. No one else had gotten her anything. So she named him and gave him a loving home.
To make a long story short, up until now, I grew to have feelings for her. Through all of the times that she was happy and sad, I'd been there for her. I'd gotten to know her. This was the girl that had singlehandedly changed the way that I saw women. But there was a problem. I had to call her, but she wouldn't call me. I had to come and visit her, but Greensboro was too far for her to drive. Everytime I asked about us being more, she only dodged the question. So I stopped. I'd decided that I wasn't chasing after anyone. Especially people that can't call or visit or answer my questions. I don't care if she wasn't as privilaged as I and maybe couldn't afford to do it.
Fast forward to this afternoon. I'm at work and I sign on to AOL, and shortly after, she pops up, and says something about how I haven't spoken to her in so long even thought the phone and the IM screen goes both ways as well. I haven't talked to her since Christmas Eve, and I thought that maybe she was trying to avoid me or something of the like. Come to find out, she has a good reason to have not said anything in so long. She's been going through hard times lately. Her father had been sick since about the time that I met her. Over the past couple of months, she's actually had to make the decision to pull the plug on oher father as well as take on all of his financial obligations and other things that come with someone's death. However, through this whole time, she's had the letters that I wrote her posted on some bulliten boards that were on her wall. They covered both of them. She's also had the puppy that I gave her where she can always keep her eyes on him. The whole time that I though maybe she didn't care about me anymore, she actually ended up thinking about me constantly. She had no choice, I was right there the whole time. I don't know what to do, I'm confused as hell because at the moment women **** me off, and I can't help but forgive her, because I care about her just that much. What scares me the most is that I might actually be having a heart... :roll: :evil: :arrow:
Do it for the butterflies... I mean, is there anything else to do/pursue at the moment???
Yeah... there is... I could pursue someone that actually seems to give a damn about things between me and them. Hell... today was the first day that I've heard from her since that day! :evil: I give the f**k up!!! :evil:
to be ummm slightly kinda positive...at least she thought of ya :arrow:
*In tears* Mannnn, go get her please...marry her or something...Sometimes you just have to put yourself out there because if you don't you're gonna always wonder what if....That really made me cry...
FOR REAL! Seriously, it sounds like this girl could be "the one" and even if she aint she still honestly impacted your life enough that it will never be the same...give her time, she will be in your life full time soon enough :wink:
Treat her as a friend. Strictly a friend. You need to see how she feels about you. If she begans to wonder why aren't you acting like you usually do then you'll know how she really feels. Sometimes, a lot of times women don't tell you the whole story or open up completely. You dig? She may be going along with your boyfriendish treatment but not really looking for much more than friendship out of you two. Maybe she at first wanted a man but after all that with her dad she no longer wanted a man, you dig? Just as times change so do emotions. But true love always outlast a relationship. That doesn't mean that it was meant to be, it just means that it was true love. What am I saying. Your feelings may be real, and it sounds like they are, but that doesn't mean that she's the one, you dig? while you giving her so much attention and while she's iggin' you the love of your life may be passing you by. You may love her but she may not be the right one. Or it may simply not be the time for you two. Timing is everything. Maybe you two are for each other but not at this particular time. If she's the true love of our life and it's just not time for you two you may mess up the whole process, you dig? Soooo stay friends. And be strictly friends to see how she acts,let me know write back.
I was doing all that to begin with. She got a lil mad because I treated her like she was just another friend. I'm through. I got done playing games and all that other good stuff, especially since that's just not my style. So I just laid it all on out there. I'm tired and I don't care anymore. Quite frankly she's reminding me why I need to be my old self again... :evil:
:roll: :evil: :arrow:
