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Trust.... Posted on 01-11-2005
Kinkee

Have any of you ladies lost the trust of your mother? Or of someone really close to you? Now you have to live the rest of your life proving a point to them cause they just won't let the situation go and everytime something happens, they throw it back in your face?
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Kinkee replied on 01-11-2005 12:29AM [Reply]
I'll start it off. Well here is my situation. Back in May 2003. I made a really big mistake of losing my virginity (to an a$$hole at that). But anywayz my parents found out. Then just automatically assumed I was pregnant. There is more to the story but I am making the story short. So after that they just look down on me. Cause I took a different path then they did. As far as waiting until marriage. So pretty much after that she told me she wants to know everything. I kept a low profile thinking that things were well between us. Right? Wrong. My cousin (she 19 too) that comes to school with me, has a baby and no one knew until she went to the hospital. So momma comes at me talking about I don't want no screw-ups. I don't care if you are 28 years old. Then I told her don't worry about me. She says that is what you said last time. So I got to the question of do you trust me? She was like I am working on it. Not a yes or no question. She said as long as I am doing what I what I am suppose to. What is that suppose to mean? But anywayz it hurt like shyt. Cause now I know she will never fully trust me. So I have washed my hands of the situation. Why can she just accept that I have to live and learn before I can fully grow? Whatever fucc it. :?
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atlprincess replied on 01-11-2005 12:50PM [Reply]
I haven't lost the trust of my mother....but if she knew some of the stuff I did with my boyfriend then she would be extremely disappointed.....but I know when I consider losing my virginity she wants me to come and talk to her about it....I think that will make her trust me more seeing that I was responsible enough to come to her about the situation.....
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Thoroughly_Confused replied on 01-11-2005 07:27PM [Reply]
I assume that my mother still trusts me in that aspect. Every now and then she asks me who this guy or that guy is and if I have a boyfriend yet. I know that if I do come to a point where I might be thinking about losing my virginity, all she would say is do you need some birth control. My mom is really cool and down to earth, so it would really take alot for her to lose trust in me. Alot of the time she just looks at the situation as there are alot of kids doing worst than me.
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AggieSweetie07 replied on 01-11-2005 07:38PM [Reply]
Kinkee wrote:
I'll start it off. Well here is my situation. Back in May 2003. I made a really big mistake of losing my virginity (to an a$$hole at that). But anywayz my parents found out. Then just automatically assumed I was pregnant. There is more to the story but I am making the story short. So after that they just look down on me. Cause I took a different path then they did. As far as waiting until marriage. So pretty much after that she told me she wants to know everything. I kept a low profile thinking that things were well between us. Right? Wrong. My cousin (she 19 too) that comes to school with me, has a baby and no one knew until she went to the hospital. So momma comes at me talking about I don't want no screw-ups. I don't care if you are 28 years old. Then I told her don't worry about me. She says that is what you said last time. So I got to the question of do you trust me? She was like I am working on it. Not a yes or no question. She said as long as I am doing what I what I am suppose to. What is that suppose to mean? But anywayz it hurt like shyt. Cause now I know she will never fully trust me. So I have washed my hands of the situation. Why can she just accept that I have to live and learn before I can fully grow? Whatever fucc it. :?
wow Kee i had no idea...that's some crazy ish...but its your body and it shouldn't matter as long as your protecting yourself and not prostituting your body...but i guess i can't really speak on that cause i never told my mom that i lost my virginity even though i'm sure she knows from the (amount of weight gain/hips) but it was never flat out said....but i hope things work out between you and your mom's... much luv....
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Kinkee replied on 01-11-2005 10:17PM [Reply]
AggieSweetie07 wrote:
Kinkee wrote:
I'll start it off. Well here is my situation. Back in May 2003. I made a really big mistake of losing my virginity (to an a$$hole at that). But anywayz my parents found out. Then just automatically assumed I was pregnant. There is more to the story but I am making the story short. So after that they just look down on me. Cause I took a different path then they did. As far as waiting until marriage. So pretty much after that she told me she wants to know everything. I kept a low profile thinking that things were well between us. Right? Wrong. My cousin (she 19 too) that comes to school with me, has a baby and no one knew until she went to the hospital. So momma comes at me talking about I don't want no screw-ups. I don't care if you are 28 years old. Then I told her don't worry about me. She says that is what you said last time. So I got to the question of do you trust me? She was like I am working on it. Not a yes or no question. She said as long as I am doing what I what I am suppose to. What is that suppose to mean? But anywayz it hurt like shyt. Cause now I know she will never fully trust me. So I have washed my hands of the situation. Why can she just accept that I have to live and learn before I can fully grow? Whatever fucc it. :?
wow Kee i had no idea...that's some crazy ish...but its your body and it shouldn't matter as long as your protecting yourself and not prostituting your body...but i guess i can't really speak on that cause i never told my mom that i lost my virginity even though i'm sure she knows from the (amount of weight gain/hips) but it was never flat out said....but i hope things work out between you and your mom's... much luv....
Thanks. I just won't say anything about it. Cause she wouldn't be able to handle it even though she claims she is concerned about me. Like I said before whatever. I am through with it.
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Blutifully Human replied on 01-11-2005 11:51PM [Reply]
Dang kee, it know that has to be hard babydoll. But just know that no one's judgement is valid but God's, and yes that even goes for your parents. If God has forgiven u for it, then it's done. I think it would be cool for u and your moms to have a talk, and for u to express your unhapness about her not trusting you. But i know that's a lot easier said than done, so go on your own pace with that one. As for me, ummm...me and my moms have fallen out a few times, but i don't think i've ever gotten to the point of losing her trust. Sometimes i used to wonder cuz i would tell her that i'm savin myself for marriage, and she'd always manage to say in a convo involving a dude "well, make sure u use protection Kenya." And i would say "Ma! I told u ain't gonna do nothin". Or when i would go out at nite back at home, she would trip about how late i come in or where i am. But i don't think that's a lack of trust, just her bein a momma. I think overall my mom has faith that i'll make the right decisions. Otherwise, she wouldn't have let me come all the way across the country by myself for school.
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Focused247 replied on 01-15-2005 12:12PM [Reply]
Um.. I haven't lost the trust of anyone important to me. There were times last year when I dissappointed my mother, but from that point on I've been upfront about everything that I've been doing or plan to do. I hide nothing from her at all and we're very close. :wink: My dad likes to get frustrated with me because I love to go against his suggestions and do things my way just to prove that I can make my own successful life and not have to live through his. But he still trusts and believes in me. As for my friends (the real ones) we have no problem with trust. That's just a blessing from God. (God is GOOD) But yea, we just always stay open and say what we feel to each other.
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Kinkee replied on 01-15-2005 03:37PM [Reply]
^^^I like that poem or those lyrics in your siggy.
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IgnoranceIsBliss replied on 01-15-2005 04:48PM [Reply]
I feel my mom as a lot of trust in me which is why I believe I never had a curfew or why she agreed to send me all the way to VA.
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